Dear Songwriting patrons, here is my first stab at songwriting for, “What If I Matter.” I typically write a poem, then put music to it. In this case, however, I picked up my bass and just started creating the song on vocals and bass, including lyrics, all at once. There are a lot of pauses in the song for that reason – just kind of feeling out what comes next. Here are the final lyrics – after developing most of the song, I sat and knocked this out in my journal:

What if I matter

These scripts
You throw at me
I disappear entirely
Under the avalanche
Of your pornography

But what if I matter

Feeling in my Body
No rules
No roles
I’m here
From head to toes
Feeling Seeing how it goes

Changing in the moment
Shifting on the fly
Flowing with sensation
Between you and I

He tore into me
With his rage
Tried to destroy me
From a young age

I over came it
But was filled
With self-hate
His venom poisoning my cells
To this day

©2021 by Loolwa Khazzoom. All rights reserved. No portion of this article may be copied without author’s permission.